Zena na Balkanu

Žena na Balkanu najvažnije da je udana. Ne znam odakle to potječe, no moram priznati da sam time poprilično razočarana. Ispada da žena bez muža nije jedinka i da ona bez muža nema svoj identitet. Žena bez muža ima grešku, manu, manjkavost…rsz_woman-674977_640

Zagovaram obitelj i njene vrijednosti. Apsolutno poštujem obitelj, ali onu funkcionalnu koja svima donosi dobro. Obitelj u kojoj djeca (ako ih ima) u poštovanju i ljubavi odrastaju u ljude. Ne podržavam da ljudi svoje drame i svađe prenose na svoju djecu i time ih traumatiziraju, ali su prihvaćeni od zajednice jer su, eto, u braku. Ovo je jako važno, jer vjerujte mi, viđam partnerske odnose koje nalikuju šou u cirkuskoj areni i nisu ni pomislili na razvod, niti koliko time štete svojoj djeci, jer oni pod svaku cjenu “moraju” biti u braku. Tako nalaže zajednica (kao da će ih kamenovati ako odluče drugačije). Zapravo, mislim da im uopće takva opcija ne pada na pamet.

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Testimony of Faith and Healing / Svjedocanstvo o bolesti, molitvi i ozdravljenju

Testimony of Faith and Healing

The story I want to share with you is not just about happiness, but it is the testimony of the disease, faith, struggle, and healing.

Until a year and a half, I had a very sketchy criteria what should happen to make me feeling satisfied in any way. I had had decent living conditions. After seeing my boyfriend couple of years, we have decided to move up, so we got married and decided to become PARENTS. No one couldn’t be happier than us when we found out I was – PREGNANT!

rsz_red-school-blur-factoryWe have had a small, comfy house (in our ownership). The finance was solid. Our relationship was great. We had everything we needed for a happy life. Only I missed job. I am extrovert and need to be around the other people. So in that way I couldn’t find the way toexplore my possibilities. I moved from town to a village (because my husband got a job here, and I didn’t work at that time after getting back from Ireland). So there weren’t desirable job offers near the place we live. As I am curious and have a restless spirit, I keep thinking I might miss something. So it looks like I took some things for granted. Obviously I wasn’t grateful all the time and I should. I was wondering should we go to work and live abroad, or get back to town, etc.

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PMS (predmenstrualni sindrom)

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Predmenstrualni ciklus, čovječe, kako te to zna razvaliti. Dva dana prije samog ciklusa, osjećam se kao me netko iscentrifugirao, zavrtio u bubnju… i, onda, snuždenu i zgužvanu (nakon procesa centrifugiranja) izbacio pred kućni prag… nek’ se cijedim i širim svoje kandže vani, poput mačke, jer u kući nitko ne smije zucnuti – PAZI GREBEM!!! Vidi se to već po mom pogledu.

Naravno da šizim i grebem, kad prethodne dvije noći nisam spavala. Prva dva dana, dok ne krene lavina, muči me nesanica i buljim u zid. Kad više ne mogu izdržati samo ležati, a ne spavati; e onda se dižem i kopam po frižideru. Šuškam. Tražim zgodne namirnice (i nezgodne). Pere me nervoza…a kad sam nervozna, kompulzivno žderem…Da, to je pravi izraz. Nije pohvalno, ali majke ti, netko puši…netko grize nokte. Ja se ubijam u hrani.

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